You have scars. You’ve got a jaded heart. You’re so dirty, you hate to look at yourself in the mirror. You’ve took so many wrong turns, you’ve forgotten which way right is. You are in such a dark place, and you feel like you are stuck. You just don’t know what to do, or where to go. You just want to hide. Because you’ve gone too far. It’s too late for you. But you come out of hiding for a few seconds to make sure others don’t get into the same place you are. Because it’s just a nightmare land that you seem to think no one can get out of. You’re a lost cause.
At night a little voice whispers to you: “you’re not good enough” “you’ll never be enough” “you don’t deserve salvation” “you don’t deserve to be redeemed” “you are not handsome/beautiful” “you’re a mess” “you’re a disgrace” “you’re trash and lower than low” “you’re a lost cause…” And it never shuts up. You’ve been told it’s lies, you’ve been told not to listen to it. But the more it keeps talking, the more it sounds like the truth. And no one would ever understand if you told them that what it says makes sense. All they can say is “don’t believe it, it’s telling you lies” but at night, it seems like it’s your only friend. It’s always there in your ear you can’t get away from it, when every one else leaves, and night time comes, it stays. So it must tell the truth, it’s always there.What you don’t think about it, is how it told you to jump off a building and kill yourself. The truth sets you free -jumping off a building kills you. There is no freedom that comes from it; only death. Freedom is living life out to its fullest! Dying is being lifeless and just being nothing. Dying isn’t freedom, suicide is dying, so obviously it’s not the truth.
I know so many others have told you: “there is a light at the end of the tunnel. There is hope. There is a way out. It’s Jesus! He changes everything.” You’ve heard it all. Everything anyone has ever said about how good and grand Jesus is. And you still don’t understand why a person who isn’t depressed, or have insecurities, or has no suicidal thoughts is talking to you about hope when they’ve never been as low and down an out as you have. Why do they even speak, you may ask yourself. But what if I told you… you don’t know everything about that person trying to speak life into you
Everyone has a past. No past is pretty. But everyone’s is different. They may put up a front the way you do, so no one will see the obvious broken person inside so desperately needs Jesus. They could have been in the same shoes you’re walking in, or simulate ones. But they found their hope, their light at the end of the tunnel, their way out; the found Jesus. They found the One who understands the pain we all face. The One who understands the insecurities, the suicidal thoughts, the lowest low thoughts. He understands it all. And He wants to help you and heal you. Because He loves you, He’s crazy about you. He saw you at your darkest moment, and how you would turn away from Him, and yet He still chose the cross and died for you. He saw that you would feel like you couldn’t approach Him. He knows the thoughts you think. He knows you better than you know you. He heard your first thought, before you were spoken into existence. He is crazy in love with you. And He was so desperate to love and have a relationship with you, that He died for you, to make it easier for you to have a relationship with Him, and to be redeemed.
Let me tell you something: we are all undeserving of everything anyone does out of love. Love is something you can never earn. It’s just something that is. Grace was born from love. Specifically made as a gift from God out love. Designed for humans. That’s it. You just except it, and thank God and Jesus for it everyday for the rest of your life.
You are never too far gone. If you were, why would God send His Son to save you, if you were too far gone and it wouldn’t work? He knew it would work. He knew it was the one thing that would save when you thought you were too far gone and not able to be saved. That’s our lifeline, Jesus’ blood. That’s what saves us. Always there, and constant, is what our God is. All we have to do is trust Him, and believe that what He says is true. He calls us, Fearfully and Wonderfully made. He calls us, handsome/beautiful. He calls us loved and adored. He calls us Princes and Princesses. He calls us His. And He will never let anything of His get lost EVER.
Please choose hope. Please choose God and Jesus, over that little voice in your head, and the thoughts that are horribly wrong. Please cling to love. Please chase God and Jesus. Because once you start chasing them this happens: “Baby you’re almost home now. Please don’t quit now. You’re almost home to me.” (Song: Out of Hiding by Steffany Gritzinger).
Always fight and never give up. There is hope. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Jesus is real, and He will be all that and so much more for you. If you’ll let Him in and sign up for the greatest adventure ever; being His. And always remember “and oh as you run, what hindered love, will only become part of the story.” (Song: Out of Hiding by Steffany Gritzinger)